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Today I got my Driver’s license after waiting, procrastinating and letting the permit expires and it takes me more than 4 years to really nail it, and the good thing I did the written and the road test once and got a passing remarks.
Friday, October 31, 2008
Ready or Not Ready???
Last August 21, 2008 I was able to talk to one of my co-worker (Crystal Guffey) about an issue that's been bothering me lately about PREGNANCY or having a KID, and she did really have a good insight about what I'm going through right now.
Because I don't know if I'm ready to have a kid (but oh well who is ready anyway to be a parent, because there are lots of young people out there who got impregnanted out of wedlock or unplanned at all but they managed it.), do I want to have a kid, do me and my hubby really want to have a kid, or I want to have a kid so I can see the fruit of our love or just want to have because I look at it as a trophy or a souvenir??? Which I don't want to cause I want it to be the fruit of our love for each other. And if I want one when do I think I want them and how?
And Crystal gave me a good book in a Bible for me to read she said to read Job and Proverbs to know how hard life can be in Job and how uplifting Proverbs is. And needs lots of prayers about it and I think I agree to this a lot because that's how I got married to my hubby through prayers and I think I need to be back on thase routine again to be prayerful and give God the drivers seat and let him cruise me to where He thinks is appropriate for me to do, thy will be done.
Because if I just tackle it by myself I can't see myself moving forward or seeing any decision that I can take by myself and I want to have my hubby to be beside me with all this stuff that's going through my head and that I would love to have more open communications about this issue that I am thinking, feeling and worrying.
I have a lot of hesitations as well why I am afraid to have a kid. First, what if I die so young and what happen to my kid? Cause this happen to me that I don't have parents at a young age. Second, what if my sister die or need me with her 3 own kids to raise? And do I think I could still help her in that matter? Third, are we ready to have a kid? Like are we ready Spiritually, Financially, Physically and Emotionally? And when do I know that I am ready to have a kid???? This is the questions that's been running in my head that still I can't find any answer and no one can...
And that day it marked the day for me to open my hearts on any possibilities that I will be tackling in days to come or in the near future...And I need to commune with God often about this issue that I am facing.
Because I don't know if I'm ready to have a kid (but oh well who is ready anyway to be a parent, because there are lots of young people out there who got impregnanted out of wedlock or unplanned at all but they managed it.), do I want to have a kid, do me and my hubby really want to have a kid, or I want to have a kid so I can see the fruit of our love or just want to have because I look at it as a trophy or a souvenir??? Which I don't want to cause I want it to be the fruit of our love for each other. And if I want one when do I think I want them and how?
And Crystal gave me a good book in a Bible for me to read she said to read Job and Proverbs to know how hard life can be in Job and how uplifting Proverbs is. And needs lots of prayers about it and I think I agree to this a lot because that's how I got married to my hubby through prayers and I think I need to be back on thase routine again to be prayerful and give God the drivers seat and let him cruise me to where He thinks is appropriate for me to do, thy will be done.
Because if I just tackle it by myself I can't see myself moving forward or seeing any decision that I can take by myself and I want to have my hubby to be beside me with all this stuff that's going through my head and that I would love to have more open communications about this issue that I am thinking, feeling and worrying.
I have a lot of hesitations as well why I am afraid to have a kid. First, what if I die so young and what happen to my kid? Cause this happen to me that I don't have parents at a young age. Second, what if my sister die or need me with her 3 own kids to raise? And do I think I could still help her in that matter? Third, are we ready to have a kid? Like are we ready Spiritually, Financially, Physically and Emotionally? And when do I know that I am ready to have a kid???? This is the questions that's been running in my head that still I can't find any answer and no one can...
And that day it marked the day for me to open my hearts on any possibilities that I will be tackling in days to come or in the near future...And I need to commune with God often about this issue that I am facing.
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